How Shelby Romanticizes Toxic Romance by Disguising it Between Humor and Pathetic Worldbuilding (by Karina)

*All opinions regarding the book are purely my own. *

 

While women today face less sexism than those in prior years, the misogyny and blatant disrespect many women still face has yet to wholly disappear from everyday life, whether it's the pay gap, the pink tax, or even subtle dismissive comments left by those still thinking women inferior or refusing to acknowledge the strict social standards. Therefore, one might think a book in which the love interest is highly sexist, even going as far as forcing the main character into a marriage, would bring to light how problematic such behavior can be. However, I am sad to say this book not only romanticizes forced proximity with murderous strangers, but the plot is also so incoherent, not even that can be its ‘saving grace.’ 

The romantic, dual-perspective novel, “Serpent & Dove,” written by Shelby Mahurin and published in late 2019, takes place in the fictional country Belterra, a poorly constructed continent with real-world French influences where witches are outlawed, while religious, seemingly Christian, police (Chasseurs) are revered. The story opens with the main character Lou, a witch, and her friend Coco waiting inside a brothel, tracking down a man who supposedly has a magical ring the two girls must obtain. After receiving the ring’s location, they plan to steal the jewelry. But before going to retrieve said ring, a few scenes occur, allowing the reader to gain more information on the setting and time. These scenes mainly consist of the main character foolishly almost being discovered as a witch when running into what will be later introduced as the love interest, and second main character, Reid, an orphan raised by the church and heavily indoctrinated to believe all women weak, and all witches evil. The book continues as Lou finally commits to her heist, but is soon interrupted by the Chasseurs, but not before catching Reid’s eye when he regards her as a ‘dangerous and violent woman.’ Lou luckily manages to escape, and here is when the book begins its downfall to ‘rock bottom.’ 

After Lou’s grand escape, the reader is met only with filler scenes as Lou colorfully explains her opinions of the previous ‘attack’ for a few chapters until she is once more found by the Chasseurs. However, Lou’s quick thinking has her pretending that Reid is an ungentlemanly pig who’s getting too handsy when he jumps to make an arrest and plays off the passersby reactions. This scene leads to the Chasseurs reluctantly making Lou seem like Reid's wife, so his attack seems more ‘just,’ as it then appears like a man simply ‘punishing’ his disobedient wife. Lou then somehow agrees (which is something arguably unlike her character,) because she thinks she’ll somehow gain protection from the men who would wish her dead if they knew her origins. I believe this scene marks where problems truly begin in this novel. Not only does this scene feel rushed, as if it was only written to force Lou and Reid together, but it also could’ve been entirely avoided had the author incorporated a similar scene when the heist took place. Personally, I find the scene only helped further solidify pre-existing ideas, such as Lou being smart and quick-witted and Reid having no free will and agreeing to whatever the Church says, meaning this substandard outdrawn scene had no place in the book.

Furthermore, everything from that scene onward is simply childish. Lou begins her protesting once Reid locks her in a room by herself all day by loudly singing explicit bar songs, despite agreeing to the arrangement. The following scenes include crude jokes, ridiculous behavior from Lou, such as sneaking out of the room by half-flirting with a 16-year-old, (Lou is 18), and a painfully slow ‘romance’ that closer resembles two puzzle pieces from different sets having been glued together. 

What frustrates me most is that every detail mentioned would have actually done well, had the author not transformed the book into an arguably bad comedy. Had Shelby (the author) taken the time to realistically configure the setting instead of littering French words in the middle of sentences, and continued portraying Lou as a strong individual like she did nearer the book’s beginning, Mahurin could have genuinely written the story as it was advertised: a romantic fantasy where two polar opposites find themselves in close proximity as they have to navigate the troubles of their different pasts, and learn to accept each other’s differences as they learn their opinions are not fact. While this idea may sound more cliche than what the author wrote, I believe it is better than pumping out another toxic YA (Young Adult) romance targeted towards those aged twelve and older.  

My last critique is on poor worldbuilding and wrong culture. Shelby wanted to create a fictional continent with real world French influences and traditions, something which, if done right, could have provided a fresh world in the Fantasy genre, since not many other books include such ties into real life. However, the book displays a clear lack of research. Nearly everything including French culture is surface level, and includes only the barest of further details, such as pastry shops and occasional French names and words. One of the lakes belonging to the fictional country is quite literally named, “L’Eau Mélancolie,” translating to “The Melancholy Water,’ a basic name lacking thought. For a book dealing with religious indoctrination and forced marriage, one might expect names with more complex nature, perhaps one relating to a real body of water in France. When writing with a specific country in mind, research is vital, as otherwise, you risk insulting that country's citizens by portraying their culture only as something fun to add into your story. 

Overall, this novel had arguably many faults, whether it be romanticizing forced marriage, dismissing sexism, or just having been sloppily created. Anyone looking for a story with serious plot and character development should likely find another read, as my only positive comments for “Serpent and Dove” are the following:

• Simple and easy read

• Some humorous moments

• Fairly decent writing that flows together

If you took the time to read all of this, congrats! If you didn’t and just skimmed… that's understandable, but you’re a meanie.